Fake Steve Schmidt and Friends

The strategy that wins us the election

In It's better than anything else we've got right now on October 2, 2008 at 3:43 pm

Other new messages we could try:

We’re losing because “life isn’t fair.”

We always tell 100% the truth, except all those times we 90% lie.

She’s not that bad, really. No seriously please just believe us.

The fundamentals of our campaign in Michigan are strong. Or, how to admit defeat in a key battleground state in 30 days.

Oh my God are we fucked in Florida too? FUCK THIS SHIT I’M GOING HOME

We could really use a deus ex machina right about now.

-Steve

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